does it come out today? IGN lists today as the release date but neither Gamestop or EBGames says anything about it and Gamestop hasn't called me to say that it's in. just wondering if anybody knows anything about it.
Quote:"At a NASDAQ event in London, chief financial officer Chris Liddell reiterated Microsoft's forecast for 10 million consoles by the end of the Christmas season. "
...
"Reaching the 10 million goal is just now a matter of sales: about a week ago the company shipped its ten millionth console. And from the looks of things, hitting the mark may not be that difficult."
Their original estimates were to have 10 million sold to consumers by the time the competition launched...looks like they missed that by a bit. Good sales in any case.
Xbox 360 sold 511,000 units in N.A. according to NPD. They're on track to sell even more in December.[Link]
I saw this on a "future tech" style show some time ago. Looks like it's finally been approved for actual use.
Read the article, but here's a basic run down. This device concentrates strong light that is "longer than x-rays but shorter than microwaves" (which is great, that only leaves a MASSIVE area of the spectrum, including visible light, infrared, and ultraviolet, that it could be within, below visible is not cancer causing, at a short point above visible, it starts becoming a risk).
Basically, it's for breaking up crowds. You shine this beam at them and it causes pain to the skin, but due to the fact it doesn't penetrate, that's ALL it does. It also is not in the visible wavelength so it won't blind people. So, severe sunburns at worst, but the pain gets people scattering pretty quickly. Apparently it turns people into basic instinct machines. No matter how bad arse you imagine yourself to be, no matter how noble. Even if you are trying to save children and you know they will die if you don't run in there and do it, this WILL make you abandon any scruples you ever had to make the pain stop as soon as possible, meaning even the most religious of zealots will RUN when the thing is turned on. Nothing like pain to expose our animal selves eh? :D
Anyway, yeah I'm all in favor of using force when it is immediately needed to end a riot, self defense and defense of others. This is basically far more effective tear gas and pellet guns. This is as close to a phaser set to stun (or... run! HILARITY! IT RHYMED WITH THE WORD STUN AND THAT IS FUNNY TO ME!) as they are going to get. At the same time, there's no such thing as a "perfect" nonlethal weapon. Let's say some elderly or otherwise very weak people get caught up in this. Maybe for them a heavy sunburn may be too much for their body to handle. "Wrong place at the wrong time" sure, but still it's a possible scenario... At any rate, that said this may be the best we've got for the moment.
I just hope it doesn't fall into the wrong hands... I'd hate to see it used to "extract information", or to just plain hurt people for enjoyment. Imagine some very mean spirited kids running around after making their own from a kit 20 years from now and riding around town hurting people with it.
Think your 60hz TV is going to make a lick of difference to your Virtual Console experience, PAL users? If your answer is "yes", PREPARE FOR DISAPPOINTMENT.
To get around the performance difference between PAL & NTSC, for years now PAL TVs have had the option of running at 60hz. A ton of last-gen games, Nintendo ones included, even gave you specific options for this feature. So it would have been natural to assume that in 2006, the Virtual Console & Wii would have accommodated this.
WRONG.
With PAL consoles in the hands of a select few, people are reporting that some VC titles (though not all) are running slower and have black on-screen borders, even when the Wii itself is set to 60hz. If you recall, these are the deficiencies PAL gamers had to put up with during the 80s and 90s, and that we were meant to be well past.
What does this mean? Well, for starters, PAL gamers are getting shafted by Nintendo. No surprises there. What it also hints at, though, is the reason why each region has had a different VC launch list. If digitally downloaded titles are maintaining the same regional differences they had in the 80s and 90s 9which is stupid when it's a download), it looks like Nintendo are directly sourcing each region's specific version of a title. So if your 1991 British version of Sonic was letterboxed and slower, then your 2006 British VC version is going to be the same game, even when a superior English-language version exists in the US.
Weak, Nintendo. It's cool you're preserving the authenticity of VC titles, but you don't need to be so meticulate that you sell PAL customers an inferior product when you no longer have to. Luke Plunkett
PAL Wii warning - [some] Virtual Console games are 50hz only with borders [Lyris Lite]
<hr><b><font size="5">I'm Gonna Get Me A Wii If It Kills Me</b></font>
By Jim Anchower
Hola, amigos. I know it's been a long time since I rapped at ya, but I got a lot on my plate these days. Serious, it was a one-two punch that almost laid Jim Anchower down for the count. Not long after I got dumped by that fat bitch Debbie, I got laid off at the carbonics place. Apparently, the market for tanks of carbon dioxide was kind of drying up, so they cut me loose.
I was stoked to get unemployment, but all I did was sit around, play my GameCube, and feel crappy. After two months, I got burned out on that, so I got a job at a big electronics store where I wear a stupid polo shirt. I spend most of my time trying not to spill stuff on it, and the rest of the time I split between watching TV and pointing people to where the DVDs are.
As much as it sucks, that job brought me some good luck last month to the tune of $1,000 in scratch-off winnings. Ron said I should buy more tickets so I could make even more, but I figure me and the lottery board are about even now. They just held onto my money until I needed something good to happen. And I been through enough dry spells to know that socking some cash away comes in handy.
I invested in some new spark plugs, a change of oil, and a full tank of gas. That was pretty much the first time I filled her all the way up in eight months. After that, I had $925, so I stocked up on soup and frozen pizza, plus a bunch of Miller Genuine Draft and a half ounce of some pretty decent weed. I still had a nice-size wad, so I paid my electricity bill.
Even after all that and a well-hidden emergency $50, there was plenty left over. I figured I would treat myself to the new Nintendo. Now, I thought "GameCube" was a bad name, but the "Wii" is about a million times weaker. I can't even make myself say it. But I stuck by Nintendo all this time, and it's got me through some rough patches, so I'm not gonna jump ship now.
I asked at work if I could set one aside, but they had some new policy that employees had to wait like everyone else. It was going on sale at midnight sharp, meaning I was gonna have to line up the day before if I was gonna stand a chance. There was no way I was gonna spend my free time waiting in front of my damn job, so as soon as my shift was over, I headed over to the store's other location across town.
I knew I was gonna want company, and I knew Ron would be easy to get. I just had to bring a flask of Yukon Jack and he was game. We got there at about 4 p.m, and there were already 15 people ahead of us. It was plenty cold, but we had a buzz on, and with our flasks we were able to keep it going for a few hours.
By around 10 p.m., I ran out of booze and things to talk about. Turns out it wasn't much fun to have someone to stand in line with you either. Ron had a second flask, but he wasn't sharing. More people were in line after us and they all brought blankets and stuff. I used to keep one in my car, but I tossed it out after I spilled a Frosty on it and it started to stink.
Ron and I just kept jumping up and down to keep warm, talking about how we were gonna kick each other's ass in video boxing. When the gates finally opened, I couldn't have been happier. All I wanted was to get out of the cold and get my new Nintendo. Ron was pretty ripped by then, and he was really starting to piss me off.
I got inside and picked up my console. Once it was in my hands, I took some time to savor the moment and to warm up. I felt like I had just struck gold, until I got to the checkout. My wallet was missing. I had to think—I didn't remember buying anything since yesterday, when I picked up Ron's Yukon. Then I realized that I was still wearing my work pants, and my wallet was in my jeans back home.
I told 'em that they better hold one for me, 'cause I was coming right back. I got in the car and gunned it. It was gonna take me at least 20 minutes to get home and 20 minutes to get back. That left me with only 20 minutes to get my wallet before they shut down again. When we got to my place, I told Ron to stay put, but he said no one tells him what to do, got out of the car, and fell flat on his face.
Once I decided that he was just unconscious, it took about 15 minutes to drag him inside so he wouldn't freeze to death. I woulda called the ambulance for him, but this kind of thing happens a lot to Ron. I figured he'd sleep it off while I got the game. I grabbed my wallet and a blanket and went back to the store.
Sure enough, when I got there, the shutter was down. That just fucking figures. I pounded on it for a few minutes, but no one showed up. I decided that since I already waited around for eight hours, I might as well wait for another five or so 'til they opened up for real, so I took a leak and lined up. I 'bout froze my nuts off waiting for those doors to open. And when they finally did, they were all out of Nintendos.
I told the guy that someone was supposed to hold it for me, but he acted like he didn't know anything about it. I thought they would help one of their own, but I guess I was wrong. He said I could get on a list, but I told him I would just sign up at my own damn store.
When I got home, Ron was gone—only he must have puked before he left, because there was a big puddle of puke in my kitchen. Well, as soon as that game comes in, I'm gonna have to make a different friend, 'cause I know one guy that ain't coming over any time soon. No one but me is allowed to puke in my kitchen without cleaning it up, and even I have to clean it up eventually.
Review: Final Fantasy V Advance
Platform: Game Boy Advance
Rating: 8/10[indent]Final Fantasy V Advance is the latest in a series of GBA ports based upon the classic series. After the more story-driven Final Fantasy IV, Final Fantasy V focuses more on the gameplay aspect, and the character-building Job system seen first in the original Final Fantasy, and expanded upon considerably in Final Fantasy III. The story centers around a group of adventurers thrown together by circumstance to share a common goal; the preservation of the world's Crystals, which maintain the forces of nature. Some malevolent and unseen force is causing them to shatter, and Bartz and his friends must find out why, and stop it before their world is thrown into chaos.
[/indent] Graphics: 7.0
[indent]Though the visuals for the game are hardly poor, they are a noticable step down from the graphics seen in Final Fantasy IV Advance, which had most of its graphics upgraded from the Super NES original. Final Fantasy V's graphics are mostly unchanged, save for the nicer pre-rendered backdrops in the battle sequences. The characters remain squat and squarely-proportioned, though the characters are better-animated and considerably more expressive than in FFIV. FFV is a big game with a lot to see, and even without the enhancements, there are still moments that will impress, but it is a bit of a disappointment that no effort was made to improve the visuals, as there was room for it.
As in previous games, the best graphics are seen in combat. Character sprites are larger, and even though Final Fantasy V has one of the smallest playable casts in the series at five, it may have the largest variety of character appearances. There are nearly two dozen Job Classes for your characters to utilize. Each Job gives your character a markedly different appearance, and each individual character appears quite unique in each outfit (for instance, Faris as a Knight looks markedly different than Lenna does when she is a Knight). Monsters are large, and better-looking and more detailed than FFIV's. Spell and skill effects are also improved over the previous game's. [/indent]
Audio: 8.0
[indent]The soundtrack for this game is rather standard, in relation to other Final Fantasies. What is there is, at worst, serviceable, and there aren't any tracks that are outright bad. Some are even quite good (the theme played while piloting the Submarine comes to mind). However, there seems to be lacking any iconic or memorable themes, the kind which you'd instantly identify if you heard it out of the blue. This game is more upbeat than most in the series, and it reflects in the generally peppy, optimistic themes found throughout most of the soundtrack. [/indent]
Gameplay: 9.0
[indent]Final Fantasy V is known for sporting the most-evolved application of the Job system that had been featured in the previous odd-numbered entries of the series (though Final Fantasy XI has since taken it much farther). This allows you to take your characters and basically customize the hell out of them, building each to your tastes and present needs. The different Jobs become available as the game unfolds, and your options get better all the time. The upside to this is that you can use many creative methods to tackle whatever problems you face, and while there are some Jobs that are of questionable, or only situational use, there aren't many that are overwhelmingly great, either. This forces you to experiment, and find the strenghts and weaknesses of each job, and the uses of the inherent talents. By gaining Ability points, your characters can memorize certain talents inherent to a Job; for instance, you can have Galuf reach level 2 in the White Mage Job, so if you decide to make him a Monk later, you can give him the option of using White Magic while enjoying the much greater offensive power the Monk class offers. There are literally thousands of possible party configurations, and many, many useful applications to be found. The game is also a bit more of a challenge than most Final Fantasies, mostly because it's more difficult to find a combination of talents and classes that make your party consistently outclass the monsters you'll face.
Outside of the Job System, Final Fantasy V is a pretty standard RPG. Outside of the Job System, any Final Fantasy veteran will instantly understand how most of the game operates. As stated earlier, there are fewer characters than in most games in the series. Storyline and character development have taken a step back from FFIV. You know who the good guys are, and you know who the bad guys are. The story rarely deviates from the standard rah-rah, save the world stuff. Those who have played the previous incarnation on the Playstation, or the fan-translated ROM, will notice that the characters and dialogue are considerably changed, and for the better. They still don't match up with the likes of Cecil or Terra's bunch, but the characters now have better-defined personalities. Bartz is still a pretty vanilla do-gooder, but he's also a bit of a wiseass. He and Galuf have many of the game's lighter moments, as the two frequenty take good-hearted jest at each other. Faris is less the Jack Sparrow stereotype, though she does still drop several groaning pirate cliches around ("By the great beard of Neptune!"). Lenna and Krile are changed little. The game's main adversary, Exdeath, is your average megalomaniac villain, the Bad Just To Be Bad stripe a la Kefka, with no redeeming traits. He wants to control the power of the Void and make the world kneel at his presence... because that's what omni-powerful villains do. Almost all of the game's dialogue has been changed and improved, so conversations flow more naturally than the clapboard translations you might remember. [/indent]
Final Word
[indent]Final Fantasy V is definitely a love-it or hate-it game. You'll enjoy it if you can overlook its rather deficient story and vanilla characters, and if you love the challenges of character-building and ciphering the nuances of the Job System. It's also a welcome addition for those looking for a bit more challenge. A worthy entry in the series, though a little lost among many of its far more memorable siblings.
![[Image: character4.article.jpg]](http://www.theonion.com/content/files/images/character4.article.jpg)
