14th July 2010, 4:49 PM
...and in the stock market today, shares of esteem in EdenMaster fell precipitously, with investors in a free-falling sell mood after EdenMaster CEO, E. DenMaster, revealed that he is an illiterate couch potatoe.
"Yea... books, is like, dumb and stuff," he is quoted as having said to our reporter. "Like... I watches... TV and stuff... you know?" He went on to add. When asked about Darunia S. Goron, renouwned Goron mogul and emperor of all the known universe, and his high-profile endorsement of the literary works of Jules Verne, EdenMaster scoffed haughtily, and closed with, "Books is dumb. The TV comedian said so. I like to take all my morality from TV comedians like Jim Gaffigan."
Shares opened the day at 14,503 rupees apiece, and by the closing bell were fizzling down about 76 rupees--certifiable junk-grade, worth just a shade more than those of long-absent Tendite OB1, whose shares slipped during the afternoon to 59 rupees apiece.
--MOOKY MOOKERSON, WALL STREET JOURNAL
"Yea... books, is like, dumb and stuff," he is quoted as having said to our reporter. "Like... I watches... TV and stuff... you know?" He went on to add. When asked about Darunia S. Goron, renouwned Goron mogul and emperor of all the known universe, and his high-profile endorsement of the literary works of Jules Verne, EdenMaster scoffed haughtily, and closed with, "Books is dumb. The TV comedian said so. I like to take all my morality from TV comedians like Jim Gaffigan."
Shares opened the day at 14,503 rupees apiece, and by the closing bell were fizzling down about 76 rupees--certifiable junk-grade, worth just a shade more than those of long-absent Tendite OB1, whose shares slipped during the afternoon to 59 rupees apiece.
--MOOKY MOOKERSON, WALL STREET JOURNAL
H.R.M. DARVNIVS MAXIMVS EX TENEBRIS EXIT REX DEVSQVE GORONORVMQVE TENDORVM ROMANORVM ET GRÆCORVM OMNIS SEMPER EST