*ASM realizes that these were beavers attacking him, not dogs. In trying to control the minds of some dogs, the beavers complete kill him. When he's dead, Darunia orders him creamated, and the ashes spread across Lake Hylia.*
H.R.M. DARVNIVS MAXIMVS EX TENEBRIS EXIT REX DEVSQVE GORONORVMQVE TENDORVM ROMANORVM ET GRÆCORVM OMNIS SEMPER EST
Being confined to Easter Island for an eternity DLN spends all his time studying the heads, one day he unlocked their secrets and recived the doomsday device
Then, all of a sudden, a rift in space opens and millions of giant elevator weasles burst out of their intergalactic prison and begin terrorizing various members of Tendo City!!
*The Goron-Canadian war is set aside, as Tendo City is terrorized by the elevator weasles. Gorons build barricades at the Goron-TC Embassy; Gorstoppo Elite Special Commandos parachute into the besieged city. The vicious weasels rule the city, as everyone's afraid to go outside*
*Darunia calls for organized war against the weasels; Canada wants more proof of their intentions, or UN permission, before lifting a finger*
*Weasels defenestrate Neo; take over his house as their own*
H.R.M. DARVNIVS MAXIMVS EX TENEBRIS EXIT REX DEVSQVE GORONORVMQVE TENDORVM ROMANORVM ET GRÆCORVM OMNIS SEMPER EST
Somehow Darunia smoking carcuss manages to comand his armies.Scientist test his remains to understand why he is still alive. They come to the conclusion that Darunia is a new lifeform.
He is then locked up and pooked and prodded by scientist examing the contents of his anus.
Darunia gains sympathy for aliens captured by humans and force to under go this humiliating ordeal.
Darunia begs forgiveness from the aliens for his terrible racial slores he utterd not so long ago, Aliens rescue and free Darunia,
The aliens accept his apology if he agrees to be a seregant mother too their children, Darunia gives birth to a alien child both half Goron and Alien.
The new Half breed goron is named Daranus after being borned out of Darunia big fat hairy ass.
This brings a new day when both Alien and Goron can fight side by side from the forces of evil and wheasels.
*Gorstoppo smash into ASM's house later that night. Find him masturbating to pictures of Darunia; they castrate him with gardening shears, and then hang him from the rafters upside down.*
H.R.M. DARVNIVS MAXIMVS EX TENEBRIS EXIT REX DEVSQVE GORONORVMQVE TENDORVM ROMANORVM ET GRÆCORVM OMNIS SEMPER EST
*ASM tries to circumsize Gorstoppo; Gorstoppo beat the fuck out of him, and castrate him again...only this time, burning his crotch so nothing will ever grow back there again*
H.R.M. DARVNIVS MAXIMVS EX TENEBRIS EXIT REX DEVSQVE GORONORVMQVE TENDORVM ROMANORVM ET GRÆCORVM OMNIS SEMPER EST
*Darunia's mother, long ago dead, is sealed away in an underground crypt. ASM finds himself buried alive in a darkened crypt, and Darunia's ancestors come back to life to eat him.*
*Sadama Bin Hussen opens a gay bar; ASM (since im sure he'll make up some way of escaping the crypt) is his first client. They share a thrilling relationship together, stay up all night talking, and draped in eachother's arms. They have a love child; who grows to become Michael Jackson*
H.R.M. DARVNIVS MAXIMVS EX TENEBRIS EXIT REX DEVSQVE GORONORVMQVE TENDORVM ROMANORVM ET GRÆCORVM OMNIS SEMPER EST
Darunia later becomes a the wealthiest homosexual in the world.
ASM kills saddam hussein and takes his money.
ASM give gifts to all the children of the world to be then delcared Santa Space marine, All the children assualt Darunia and bites his boobs off for disrespecting Santa Claws.
ASM now rules the world with his army of children.
*Darunia redeclares war on ASM for that gay crack; grows new boobs*
*Goron 1rst Army (720,000), under General Granit von Goron, routs ASM's inept army of 20,000 children at the Plains of Abraham. With out a working unit between him and Santa Space Marine's, Darunia quickly takes that location. ASM surrenders immediately.*
*End of war*
H.R.M. DARVNIVS MAXIMVS EX TENEBRIS EXIT REX DEVSQVE GORONORVMQVE TENDORVM ROMANORVM ET GRÆCORVM OMNIS SEMPER EST
One day in Tendo City, the populace is going about it's regular self...Darunia is leading a bayonette charge against OB1 in the town square...Weltall is digging the bugs out of the server...Neo is yakking about Canadian politics at the local bar.
Then, a tall, dark figure steps into the town.
Immediately, everyone glances at the new comer. He is tall and dark, his face stoic and his eyebrows slanted.
*Continue*
H.R.M. DARVNIVS MAXIMVS EX TENEBRIS EXIT REX DEVSQVE GORONORVMQVE TENDORVM ROMANORVM ET GRÆCORVM OMNIS SEMPER EST
....The tall, mysterious figure comes out and reveals himself to be OB2, OB1's evil twin brother!! OB2 takes a nearby cow and throws it at Darunia, killing the poor bastard.
Then DJ comes in, dressed as a man but kind of looking like a girl so no one really knows what sex he/she/it is, and throws a bunch of lemons at OB2!
OB2 then runs over to DJ, holds up his/her/its arm and proclaims to everone: "WE HAVE A WINNER!!!"
At the exact moment that TC explodes a butterfly somewhere near the west coast flaps it's wings. These two things occuring at the same time cause a rift in the fabric of space and time to open and OB2 is sucked into to a strange alternate bizarro netherverse.
Where OB2 finds a magic internet connection to this universe and becomes the perfect opposite counter to OB1... and they spiral together and like matter and antimatter destroy eachother. :)
But then the story gets caught in a loop and begins again, but this time it starts out with Undertow eating a pint of ice cream. Most likely Ben and Jerry's, not that cheap Shaw's junk.
<font size='-2'>ANIMATION CENTRAL ALL ANIMATIONS HAVE TO GO!</font>
<img src="http://img214.imageshack.us/img214/5493/d71762spacecow7jj.gif">
Ben and Jerry's is the best kind of ice cream... but its so expensive. Usually we get Edy's (Dreyer's for you silly westerners), or Hood, or something... not storebrand (Hannaford for me... Shaw's isn't nearly as nice. At least not here.), storebrand ice cream isn't too good...
Oh yeah, and who said anything about all of existance? Just the two OB1s are destroyed... after all you are more important than the rest of the universe and outweigh it so after you are demolished both halves would shoot away from eachother... :)
...Are you sure that YOU aren't the evil one and he's the good one?
*Darunia regains consciousness, and shoves the cow off. Getting up, he sees OB1 and OB2 sixty-nining in the Tendo City Square. Repulsed at the blatant, disgusting horror, he sounds his trumpet, and the 15th Imperial Goron Horse come galloping into the scene. The 7,300-horse élite squadron runs down the two lovers, and then goes on to loot and pillage TC, before dispersing.*
H.R.M. DARVNIVS MAXIMVS EX TENEBRIS EXIT REX DEVSQVE GORONORVMQVE TENDORVM ROMANORVM ET GRÆCORVM OMNIS SEMPER EST
~Lois - "Stewie, why don't you play in the other room"
Stewie -"Why don't you burn in hell?!?!"
Lois - "Well, no dessert for you young man"~
~Stewie: Damn you vile woman, you've impeded my work since the day I escaped your vile womb!~
~Peter Griffin: Oh, you people can kiss the fattest part of my ass!~
~[While trying to potty-train Stewie]
Peter Griffin: Maybe you don't have to pee. I'll just give you some beer, it'll run right through you.
Stewie: Beautiful. And while we're at it we can light up a dubey and watch porn!
Peter Griffin: Rea...Really?~
A magical muffin, which fused them into a single entity! This new fused being loved Star Wars so it called itself OB1 alone.
Then...
"On two occasions, I have been asked [by members of Parliament], 'Pray, Mr. Babbage, if you put into the machine wrong figures, will the right answers come out?' I am not able to rightly apprehend the kind of confusion of ideas that could provoke such a question." ~ Charles Babbage (1791-1871)
OB1! But they soon realized that whenever they hit OB1 (who by the was they all WERE) they would refuse permanently. Fortunatly, they became much more powerful after fusing. Sadly, conservation of energy laws being what they are, that's the same amount of energy they lost when they split in the first place.
"On two occasions, I have been asked [by members of Parliament], 'Pray, Mr. Babbage, if you put into the machine wrong figures, will the right answers come out?' I am not able to rightly apprehend the kind of confusion of ideas that could provoke such a question." ~ Charles Babbage (1791-1871)
... Which turns out to be false, as DJ doesn't understand that each OB1 exists in his own seperate universe but with the magic of butterflies they're able to exist in this universe as well, with the same amount of power that the original OB1 had!