That's.. not... right... NOT RIGHT AT ALL!

[Dark Jaguar]

http://www.bogleech.com/bio-para.html

A parasite that eats the tongue of a certain fish and REPLACES it.

http://www.everything2.com/index.pl?node_id=1418509

A parasite that, at a certain time, mind controllinates the ant and so the ant seeks out a blade of grass and hangs on the very end with it's mighty mandibles until a cow comes by and eats it. MIND TAKER!

Supreme darkness!

[Darunia]

You're quite right. That's not right at all. I don't want one of those coming near me while I'm taking a bath.

[Weltall]

Thankfully, you'll be safe 364 days of the year.

...oooh, snap

[Sacred Jellybean]

---Nowhere to Run---
Roughly 80% of all human beings on earth have one or more internal parasite infestations. For america, the estimate is 95%. Almost all human beings will suffer from internal or external parasites at least once in their lifespan and may never even know it.

Paranoid entertainment is great. It's like a horror movie, only, like, nonfiction.

---Eyeball Lice---
The parasitic copepod Ommatokoita (a crustacean) lives only anchored in the cornea of the greenland shark, feeding on the eyeball jelly. It is thought that these creatures may be more symbiotic than parasitic - the shark seems able to function normally without its sense of vision, and the dangling parasites may attract fish straight to the shark's jaws.

Something's definitely wrong with my vision. There are little specks of dust in my eyes. If I can focus on one and look into a certain direction, it will slowly (as I focus more) move to the same position of my eye. Kind of like dust on a camera, but it moves.

No, I'm not saying it's this creature, but it got me thinking of that.

---Body Snatcher---
Sacculina, a type of barnacle, begins its life in the ocean as a free-swimming larva. When the female locates a crab, however, she actually discards most of her own body, leaving a gelatinous blob that enters the crab and begins to grow. It sprouts rootlike tendrils which spread through the crab like a plant, even wrapping around its eyes. Eventually it forms a small hole on the crab's back, through which male Sacculina can enter and permanently join the female. The crab stops growing and stops mating, devoting all of its energy into caring for the parasite's millions of eggs and larvae as if they were its own. Male crab hosts are altered by the parasite to think and act like females, even changing physically to better carry the barnacle's young.

I... think I want to curl up into a ball and cry now.

[N-Man]

Hahaa, that's awesome. Alien is a bedtime story compared to these guys.

[Geno]

Is this the terrorists' new bio-weapon?

[Dark Jaguar]

Parasites are the great blight upon LIFE.

Basically, an odd number of parasites can alter chemistry to change the behavior of creatures. However, something more complicated in it's behavior, like even a lizard, seems to be out of the reach. In other words, while a parasite may make us violent, the nature of the human brain, that is with very little actual direct built in responses to specific stimuli (we can recognize faces and tend to follow moving objects when we are born, that seems to be about it), the parasites will need to actually adjust our neural pathways if they want to control us.

Do not worry. Everything is alright. You are safe.

[Geno]

You can stop cowering in the corner as life passes you by, folks.

[Great Rumbler]

That's some pretty weird stuff.

[Dark Jaguar]

Yes, who would create such things? I blame those darned scientists, with their... observations!

[Geno]

Even though this never affected me before, now that it's been discovered, I'm afraid!

[Dark Jaguar]

YOU SHOULD BE!

...

And yes, that is a perfectly logical thing to say. This never affected you before, no reason to be afraid NOW. However, in the future should a situation occur involving a parasite invading the wrong host (which is almost always worse than when it invades it's intended host), you will know what you are up against. At least this isn't that dreaded fish that digs itself into the gills of larger fish and feeds on gill blood. That has GOT to be painful. What's more painful is this. They track their hosts via the trail of amonia coming out of them (urine basically). The wrong host there leads to one of two places, neither pleasent.

[Sacred Jellybean]

Even though this never affected me before, now that it's been discovered, I'm afraid!

Indeed! Everyone, band together and write your congressman. It's this kind of knowledge that's dangerous to the American public. I'm sure we can exploit SOMETHING in the Patriot Act...

[Geno]

Well I'm gonna march on Washington!
Lead the fight and charge the brigades!
There's a hero inside of all of us!
I'll make them see everyone has AIDS!

Wait, this isn't about AIDS, that's Tuesday's meeting. This is about... that parasite thing... right... LET'S MARCH ON WASHINGTON!