It... Just... Won't... Stop...

[Dark Jaguar]

http://www.1up.com/do/newsStory?cId=3151720

Looks like yet more lawsuiting over "hot coffee".

Look you idiots. The content was dummied out! When the game is played without modification, that content is absent! I'd be mad if Final Fantasy IV actually advertised the content they dummied out of the original version FOR the original version, only to find I couldn't access it at all until someone hacked it with a Game Genie. I'd call it false advertising. Why is this any different?

Morons... This really is about as bad as the higher rating Oblivion was forced to adopt because someone found a way to hack the game to remove everyone's clothes.

Penny Arcade was right... Not long before the Etchisketch is sued because someone drew square genitals on it.

[Dark Jaguar]

Fine!

Just teach the kiddies that the universe is balanced: for every good, there is an equal corresponding evil. Santa Claus exists, but so does the Anti-Claus, the mighty St Walrus himself. Every Walrustide (Dec 25th), St Walrus opens an interdimensional portal from his walrusy hell and breaks into your home just after Santa leaves. St Walrus then removes all the really good presents Santa brought, and leaves behind only the crap other people gave you. Did you really think that toy pony set was from Santa? No, that has Mommy's unimaginative handwriting all over it. Santa brought you rocket boots. Too bad they're being digested in St Walrus's stomach right now. Those would have rocked. So yes, Santa is real, and he does bring you presents. Too bad you'll never get them, not a single one, because St Walrus is just a few minutes behind him.

And if you love life, don't try to stay up to see Santa and rescue your presents from St Walrus. Santa is good-natured about being spied upon. St Walrus is not. Santa will say "ho, ho, ho" and giggle like a sack of gelatin dessert, or something. St Walrus will take you back to his walrusy dimension with him, and you don't want that. Not even for rocket boots.

To add more magic to the myth, if you have small children, waft some dead fish around the living room right before they come downstairs on Xmas Day. Slash the sofa cushions, as if with mighty tusks, and litter some crushed seashells around beneath the tree. "Say, Billy, that's a nice basketball your grandpa gave you. I bet Santa brought you your own NBA team, but they're walrus chow now."

[Great Rumbler]

I'm going to tell my kids that.

Ha-ha! Mental institutions.

[Dark Jaguar]

Plan on telling your kids that the tooth fairy is actually more harpie-like, clinging upside down to the ceiling with her talons, staring down at children with her glowing yellow eyes and suddenly pouncing to take the child's lost teeth to continue making a necklace from them, leaving behind lose change which it took from those unfortunate enough to spy upon it during their waking moments. Add to that myth by marking up the ceiling with great gashes as though some creature had been worrying itself back and forth with great concentration. The kids will love it!

[A Black Falcon]

Mods are the devil! Ban them!!!!!