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    Tendo City Tendo City: Metropolitan District Ramble City !!GORONIC INVASION!! TAKE NOTE!!!

     
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    !!GORONIC INVASION!! TAKE NOTE!!!
    Darunia
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    #5
    14th September 2026, 3:26 PM
    ...Darunia scowls at the adversary. Waving his arms, the scores of Goronic might -- elements of 334th, 176th and 228th Goronic Imperial Guard, as well as chausseurs à pied from the 14th, 18th and 36th battalions -- and in one defeaning, blinding spectacle, they began simultaneously unloaded hundrds of clips -- thousands of rounds -- into the newly-revealed, hitherto concealed compartment with the ... things that he said were there.

    The barrage lasted several minutes, in which time not only the cybernetic... ninja things in their frog pods -- were obliterated. Not only were they no longer there, but the wall beyond, as well as the Finnish  pastry-bakery adjacent, as well as 3/5ths of the Walmart what there-from abutted, as well... the air was thick, black with smoke and the over-poweringly mechanical smell of hot steel, and destruction.

    N-Man, cowering in the corner, regretted even making himself known or seen!

    "Mercy! O mercy, Lord Darunius Maximus!"

    At the point of a meaty finger, Goron troops advanced, in their black military regalias, and hauled N-Man away. He pleaded, in vain, to his comrades, who sat still, silently, stunned.

    Darunia paced the bar for a moment, gloating over his string of victories.

    "Now... I am annexing Ramble City. Furthermore, I am renaming three of the Great Lakes after myself, and also the Bay of Biscay. I am willing to share Tendo City proper with you, but will require reparations in the form of $5.6 trillion USD, to be paid in monthly installments of butter, sugar---

    "Yo, Goron!"

    Someone dared interrupt Darunia! All gasped --and in unison, all eyes turned towards the direction of the blaggard who had spoken over Darunia! It had been Geno. Finding his mettle, he now stood up atop the bar, leveling a double-barreled shotgun square at Darunia S. Goron, Lord of Nebraska, Conqueror of the Welsh, Defeater of the Paw Patrol, etc., etc.!

    All fell silent. Not even Darunia said a word, at first. Overhead, the song, "Everywhere" by Fleetwood Mac ended. After a brief ad about feminine hygiene products, who had sponsored the previous song, on came "Inagaddadavida" by Iron Butterfly.

    As the first psychedelic notes filled the air, all eyes returned to the imposing, brawny mass of Lord Darunia, who assumed a fancy ninja/karate/whatever stance, like Neo from the first Matrix movie. That was a great movie. 

    ...

    "Yo -- let's roll."
    H.R.M. DARVNIVS MAXIMVS EX TENEBRIS EXIT REX DEVSQVE GORONORVMQVE TENDORVM ROMANORVM ET GRÆCORVM OMNIS SEMPER EST
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    Messages In This Thread
    !!GORONIC INVASION!! TAKE NOTE!!! - by Darunia - 12th September 2026, 11:01 AM
    RE: !!GORONIC INVASION!! TAKE NOTE!!! - by Dark Jaguar - 12th September 2026, 11:55 PM
    RE: !!GORONIC INVASION!! TAKE NOTE!!! - by N-Man - 13th September 2026, 3:13 AM
    RE: !!GORONIC INVASION!! TAKE NOTE!!! - by Geno - 14th September 2026, 11:36 AM
    RE: !!GORONIC INVASION!! TAKE NOTE!!! - by Darunia - 14th September 2026, 3:26 PM
    RE: !!GORONIC INVASION!! TAKE NOTE!!! - by Geno - Yesterday, 2:51 PM

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