29th September 2007, 8:42 PM
Dear God that's more than four! This calls for wild accusations and unfounded claims.
I found this on http://www.reuters.com
Rare Dark Jaguar death under investigation.
While on his way to visit his grandparents (details below) DJ was struck by a vintage 1978 black Jaguar XJ Sedan head on, applied directly to his forehead, on the corner of West Palmetto st. and the 301 in Pee Dee and survived. But then died shortly after having fully realized the irony; laughing so hard that he shot his own brains out his nose. Dr. Pery involved with the investigation who was called to the local hospital where DJ was found in the breakroom, collapsed on the floor next the streams of fluids and organic matter coined the condition as "humor enduced brain evacuation" and has since been nominated to be awarded 7 distinct honors for its discovery. "Sometimes things are just too ironic" Said Dr, Pery, he added: "... the body has no choice but to reject its own brain, much like food that had gone bad." DJ's family, still unable to interview released a small statement to the press which reads:
"It's not funny. Not in the least, in any way. What happened is not funny. At all. It is not, seriously not funny."
For unknown reasons the parents have decided to wait until 6 days have passed before telling his friends of his accident so that people will notice his absence prior to releasing the statement. During a brief phone conversation with DJ's mother (a day before this article would be made public) she explained "The more boring of the crew there (at Tendo City) will start asking questions, the ones with no sense of humor. Accountants... ABF. That thing. Then others will ask questions, when everyone's really worried we'll tell them he's dead. Guilt is like wine, you have to step on the grapes... or whatever." Light Tiger, DJ's mother, consoled by her boyfriend lazyfatbum will be attending the funeral in Africa under the Cats Tree of anthropormorphic human felines which includes left handed people and women who own their own lifting belt.
The irony of the accident is under heavy investigation because of its nature. "That just doesn't happen." said Investigations Officer and head of the Pee Dee CIS officer Rutz Haggerdy. The map used (shown below) is believed to be a code of some type though no further details were given.
<a href="http://www.mapquest.com/directions/main.adp?do=nw&long=%2d80002866&2pn=Grandparent%27s%20Secret&height=564&q=grandparents%20vista&2ct=NA&1y=US&r=f&1z=28012&2a=4761%20Highway%20501%20%23%208&mo=ma&2s=SC&2c=Myrtle%20Beach&dtype=s&2ffi=1&cl=EN&width=986&2v=ADDRESS&1qn=DJ%27s%20house&lat=34506920&did=1191124745&2qn=grandparents%20vista&qq=XdcTfhe4RRVLsI0GT2xIgHKHRJo5%252bDkW9lRZOxmDsEATU8iFRuPhvNLnNRO0B%252bHO3wwrhzmgZqPcOsKslzJXY9srEtx8rkiYD%252bETzAIgbVuHb6v10yJgRseovxj3bQjYv5pNE1U%252f1XSxMIL1%252bpmHA3%252fs51Q2ImwvgcgjcGC5d4XDhpZO5cTIZQXyQuPNbVCXK50%252fU8IfNBjMK5jU4csoyhw4gyqWHI3m%252fFll19zKsZQksYwu2sSLUs0KPAbqN%252bkuYmzZXMt5xxcJGtoazsGq%252bx2AznZcZa8Z3je8xlw7ibBRfTLuV0CFOmjVdAW5LeTOSa65JKVUFRGFTYm%252f4RdM7TbqCoIoWAh%252bFDQeBHR2vylH4MBvL3xeArbgbEpQMfIXY8TG1f5mkxzttxC3xhmogxueg8%252bZTCPPprQ4CooSxy1ZkOA5qgaNRJue8unyw7PbV2s15M32jyKMS2RPaf1tI97%252bijBKh%252f5fbm0IEw2uK1gKhaNsynT7ic9aNf6q7w25G42sr1YGKMcXmORB5ztgzQwxSaYSfsgsl6v4aUsByy3HjXFcVc9HoFLGQ56iIibDlzUcg2mhcRrBbWtoWdV7gUEfdM0K1pzop7O7WWkoMd40f9jYsnAtdl3Zlrp1pB8qLtbZhDE5rKB6Oe8uCEhRFi%252bGOdWxou6JuT8bpJTG4k%252bxaFjmGeY7cv1acXEaCD0V9McvGjg7m8GK8FZekc8lBw%253d%253d&1a=1330%20Fallingbrook%20Ct&2y=US&un=m&2z=29579&1s=NC&1c=Belmont&zoom=4&1pl=704%2d616%2d5937&2qc=Children%27s%20Clothing&2pl=843%2d236%2d9456&1ffi=1&go=1&rsres=1&1v=ADDRESS&ct=NA&1pn=Party%20House%20Dj%27s&1l=EqgXIC3H13buipknVn3BPQ==&1g=Y1jkb2yO6IfD7IyDV5OMyA==&2l=g/sDmvTXxCtH2tIJ/GGHmw==&2g=eEc//bY9sens+gxLBobGPQ==">Driving Directions from House - Dj's, to Grandparent's</a>
I found this on http://www.reuters.com
Rare Dark Jaguar death under investigation.
While on his way to visit his grandparents (details below) DJ was struck by a vintage 1978 black Jaguar XJ Sedan head on, applied directly to his forehead, on the corner of West Palmetto st. and the 301 in Pee Dee and survived. But then died shortly after having fully realized the irony; laughing so hard that he shot his own brains out his nose. Dr. Pery involved with the investigation who was called to the local hospital where DJ was found in the breakroom, collapsed on the floor next the streams of fluids and organic matter coined the condition as "humor enduced brain evacuation" and has since been nominated to be awarded 7 distinct honors for its discovery. "Sometimes things are just too ironic" Said Dr, Pery, he added: "... the body has no choice but to reject its own brain, much like food that had gone bad." DJ's family, still unable to interview released a small statement to the press which reads:
"It's not funny. Not in the least, in any way. What happened is not funny. At all. It is not, seriously not funny."
For unknown reasons the parents have decided to wait until 6 days have passed before telling his friends of his accident so that people will notice his absence prior to releasing the statement. During a brief phone conversation with DJ's mother (a day before this article would be made public) she explained "The more boring of the crew there (at Tendo City) will start asking questions, the ones with no sense of humor. Accountants... ABF. That thing. Then others will ask questions, when everyone's really worried we'll tell them he's dead. Guilt is like wine, you have to step on the grapes... or whatever." Light Tiger, DJ's mother, consoled by her boyfriend lazyfatbum will be attending the funeral in Africa under the Cats Tree of anthropormorphic human felines which includes left handed people and women who own their own lifting belt.
The irony of the accident is under heavy investigation because of its nature. "That just doesn't happen." said Investigations Officer and head of the Pee Dee CIS officer Rutz Haggerdy. The map used (shown below) is believed to be a code of some type though no further details were given.
<a href="http://www.mapquest.com/directions/main.adp?do=nw&long=%2d80002866&2pn=Grandparent%27s%20Secret&height=564&q=grandparents%20vista&2ct=NA&1y=US&r=f&1z=28012&2a=4761%20Highway%20501%20%23%208&mo=ma&2s=SC&2c=Myrtle%20Beach&dtype=s&2ffi=1&cl=EN&width=986&2v=ADDRESS&1qn=DJ%27s%20house&lat=34506920&did=1191124745&2qn=grandparents%20vista&qq=XdcTfhe4RRVLsI0GT2xIgHKHRJo5%252bDkW9lRZOxmDsEATU8iFRuPhvNLnNRO0B%252bHO3wwrhzmgZqPcOsKslzJXY9srEtx8rkiYD%252bETzAIgbVuHb6v10yJgRseovxj3bQjYv5pNE1U%252f1XSxMIL1%252bpmHA3%252fs51Q2ImwvgcgjcGC5d4XDhpZO5cTIZQXyQuPNbVCXK50%252fU8IfNBjMK5jU4csoyhw4gyqWHI3m%252fFll19zKsZQksYwu2sSLUs0KPAbqN%252bkuYmzZXMt5xxcJGtoazsGq%252bx2AznZcZa8Z3je8xlw7ibBRfTLuV0CFOmjVdAW5LeTOSa65JKVUFRGFTYm%252f4RdM7TbqCoIoWAh%252bFDQeBHR2vylH4MBvL3xeArbgbEpQMfIXY8TG1f5mkxzttxC3xhmogxueg8%252bZTCPPprQ4CooSxy1ZkOA5qgaNRJue8unyw7PbV2s15M32jyKMS2RPaf1tI97%252bijBKh%252f5fbm0IEw2uK1gKhaNsynT7ic9aNf6q7w25G42sr1YGKMcXmORB5ztgzQwxSaYSfsgsl6v4aUsByy3HjXFcVc9HoFLGQ56iIibDlzUcg2mhcRrBbWtoWdV7gUEfdM0K1pzop7O7WWkoMd40f9jYsnAtdl3Zlrp1pB8qLtbZhDE5rKB6Oe8uCEhRFi%252bGOdWxou6JuT8bpJTG4k%252bxaFjmGeY7cv1acXEaCD0V9McvGjg7m8GK8FZekc8lBw%253d%253d&1a=1330%20Fallingbrook%20Ct&2y=US&un=m&2z=29579&1s=NC&1c=Belmont&zoom=4&1pl=704%2d616%2d5937&2qc=Children%27s%20Clothing&2pl=843%2d236%2d9456&1ffi=1&go=1&rsres=1&1v=ADDRESS&ct=NA&1pn=Party%20House%20Dj%27s&1l=EqgXIC3H13buipknVn3BPQ==&1g=Y1jkb2yO6IfD7IyDV5OMyA==&2l=g/sDmvTXxCtH2tIJ/GGHmw==&2g=eEc//bY9sens+gxLBobGPQ==">Driving Directions from House - Dj's, to Grandparent's</a>