Experiment #784

[lazyfatbum]

I visited Yahoo Chatrooms under the name lazyfatbum2000.

I went to 9 Yahoo chat rooms.

In 3 of them, I asked an average of 4 people a minute to cyber with me.

In 3 others, I engaged normal conversation.

In the last 3, I did absolutely nothing.

2 hours went by.

In the 3 rooms that I tried to cyber with people I got asked out by a director in India, invited to a all-girl orgy in California and saw a live cam of an 18 year old post-op transvestite. I was asked to cyber with over 100 times, I lost count.

In the room where I had normal conversation I got the addresses and phone numbers of over 40 men and women who would like to 'have fun' with me, saw a live cam of a girl that used to be a gymnast twist her body so that she could give herself oral sex and had 3 women "fall in love" with me and beg me to come see them.

In the rooms where I did nothing, I recieved the following PM's:

Hi
I'm from Europe
Do you like dogs

hey
is your dick hard
Mine is
j/k
r ur there
im still hard

I have tits

hey man
weed brother
ok?

hi am from argentina
asl
your name is not descriptive of you i hope...

I'M FAT 2

...ya bum lol

i wanna party
wheres the party
party

omfg i saw ur pic in ur pro...
nm it wasnt u
whers ur pic
i bet your F A T
asl

Hey hone im showing right now
come see me
I me tyou in the other room
hey come see me
i'm all soapy

i'm asian ok?
my boyfriend is out of town
I need you
OK?

...ya
FUCKASS

you been idle for 2 hours
r u jacking off
can I watch
ok

My conclusion:

We are all desperate animals of sexual torture and we're all going to hell, in a line, 2 by 2.

[Dark Jaguar]

There are a few things I must know about your experiment.

Number uno, what were the names of those chatrooms? You know, for research... Really though I just want to see if you picked "general" chat or specific "matchmaking" rooms for all of these. If you picked nothing but matchmaking rooms, then I would suggest also going into "general" chat rooms as the all important control.

[Great Rumbler]

I knew there was a reason why I avoid chatrooms like the plague.

[A Black Falcon]

Yeah...

[Undertow]

Your findings are very interesting. I've done my own research on the mtv.com chat boards/ rooms.

[Great Rumbler]

Not particularly suprising, however.

[EdenMaster]

Hey hone im showing right now
come see me
I me tyou in the other room
hey come see me
i'm all soapy

[Darunia]

Why--these findings are dubious at best! What's your controlled deviation, and your hypothesis? Did you even used the scientific method? Finally, what good does this do for humanity?

Lazy's grade in the 8th grade science faire:


C-

[Dark Jaguar]

Benjamin Franklin: What good is a newborn baby?

[EdenMaster]

The answer is obvious.

[lazyfatbum]

Generally I began with the theory "We're going to hell in a handbasket", my hypothesis is already concluded: we all go to hell. My control was the room where I did nothing, my cross examination was the room where I engaged normal conversation. In all 3 events, I had the same outcome.

And I skipped 8th grade. When kids had baking soda volcanos I gave a lecture on the theology of love in story telling and the overall structure of forced sociatal regimes.

Eat a dick. :snow:

[Dark Jaguar]

It would seem so, but again, what was the TOPIC of these rooms? There are many extenuating thingamajiggers that render any conclusions impossible. You have to design the experiment so that the ONLY answer you can get from it is either a definitive yes or no to your hypothesis.

[Great Rumbler]

Yes, please tell us the topics so that we will know never to go to those chatroom ever.

[lazyfatbum]

Oh, it was in the area of romance:

20's Love
30's Love
Flirting
etc

and yes, please avoid all 400 of those rooms.

[Dark Jaguar]

Romance eh? That explains it.

For your test to prove that EVERYONE ON THE PLANET is a perve, you must do it again, but this time include not just romance, but general rooms, game rooms, and pretty much... whatever, and document it ALL. By the end you should have tested about 300 or so rooms.

[Great Rumbler]

and yes, please avoid all 400 of those rooms.

And so I shall.

[Smoke]

Strange, I'm a perv yet I've never cybered.

[Great Rumbler]

Maybe someday you will, Smoke. Maybe someday.