31st March 2004, 1:37 PM
Hello, I'm Spiro T. Agnew. You may know me as the former vice president under President Nixon, but now I have my own show. It's a show about people, but not just any kind of people. Oh no, this show is about people who do things. Doers, we call this people. Doers of things. Great Rumbler is one such person. He is a doer of things. A great many things in fact. Some of these things even count as mundane, although most are simply things that one could reasonably expect by even the most ordinary of automaton. But that is neither here nor there nor, as some have even speculated, underwear.
Great Rumbler...comic artist...poster of nonsense...and all-around doer of things. This is his story.
Born in Spoonbill, Massachussets, on February 31st 19 and 58, Great Rumbler was an ordinary young boy. He exhibited no special traits and simply was. Our story would have ended here had it not been for that one fateful night. It was June 38th of the year 1976 and Great Rumbler was on his way home from school. It was raining heavily that day and lightening was flashing all around. Suddenly, Great Rumbler was struck by a bolt of lightening. It was no ordinary lightening, however, it was the lightening of the magical fairie people who lived on East-South Main Street and who never paid the water bills and were a general annoyance to their neighbors. Upon being struck by the lightening, Great Rumbler was transformed into Gregory Hynes, lord of all evil and even things that are only partially evil and could possibly only be considered annoying. And you know this little pop-ups you get while surfing the internet that you can't close them untill they load all the way? He was lord of those too.
Great Rumbler, however, did not desire this evil power. He instead used it for the betterment of mankind in the only way he knew how, utter nonsensical insanity of the highest degree of crazy. From that day forward Great Rumbler would use his powers at various forums, spreading his message of universal harmony through shared apprehension of that one kid who always sits in the darkest corner of the classroom and always mumbles.
3 years later Great Rumbler used his powers to create the comic that would spawn an internet phenomenon: The TC Ava-Comcs. From that day on Great Rumbler would be known throughout the internet as "The one who makes those comic that are the funniest thing I have ever seen".
Sadly, Great Rumbler's career was cut short when, in his 22nd year of life, he was struck down by writer's block. The disease absolutely devastated him and he could no longer use his powers. Eventually he was forced to flee as the members of the forum, angered by the absense of their beloved comics, stormed his moutain fortress in Quebec and demanded he create more.
No one knows what happened to Great Rumbler after that. Some say he found the Fountain of Youth and lives forever in the land of unicorns and holly berries, others say that he discovered his soul-mate in a rundown automotive factory and that he lives out the rest of his days with his wife in the mountains of eastern Pakistan.
But whatever happened to this creative and utterly insane man one thing is sure, Great Rumbler, the man who made us laugh, will live on forever in our hearts.
This has been Spiro T. Agnew reporting. Good night, everyone.
Great Rumbler...comic artist...poster of nonsense...and all-around doer of things. This is his story.
Born in Spoonbill, Massachussets, on February 31st 19 and 58, Great Rumbler was an ordinary young boy. He exhibited no special traits and simply was. Our story would have ended here had it not been for that one fateful night. It was June 38th of the year 1976 and Great Rumbler was on his way home from school. It was raining heavily that day and lightening was flashing all around. Suddenly, Great Rumbler was struck by a bolt of lightening. It was no ordinary lightening, however, it was the lightening of the magical fairie people who lived on East-South Main Street and who never paid the water bills and were a general annoyance to their neighbors. Upon being struck by the lightening, Great Rumbler was transformed into Gregory Hynes, lord of all evil and even things that are only partially evil and could possibly only be considered annoying. And you know this little pop-ups you get while surfing the internet that you can't close them untill they load all the way? He was lord of those too.
Great Rumbler, however, did not desire this evil power. He instead used it for the betterment of mankind in the only way he knew how, utter nonsensical insanity of the highest degree of crazy. From that day forward Great Rumbler would use his powers at various forums, spreading his message of universal harmony through shared apprehension of that one kid who always sits in the darkest corner of the classroom and always mumbles.
3 years later Great Rumbler used his powers to create the comic that would spawn an internet phenomenon: The TC Ava-Comcs. From that day on Great Rumbler would be known throughout the internet as "The one who makes those comic that are the funniest thing I have ever seen".
Sadly, Great Rumbler's career was cut short when, in his 22nd year of life, he was struck down by writer's block. The disease absolutely devastated him and he could no longer use his powers. Eventually he was forced to flee as the members of the forum, angered by the absense of their beloved comics, stormed his moutain fortress in Quebec and demanded he create more.
No one knows what happened to Great Rumbler after that. Some say he found the Fountain of Youth and lives forever in the land of unicorns and holly berries, others say that he discovered his soul-mate in a rundown automotive factory and that he lives out the rest of his days with his wife in the mountains of eastern Pakistan.
But whatever happened to this creative and utterly insane man one thing is sure, Great Rumbler, the man who made us laugh, will live on forever in our hearts.
This has been Spiro T. Agnew reporting. Good night, everyone.
Sometimes you get the scorpion.