Tendo City
MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Printable Version

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MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - lazyfatbum - 25th December 2004

'Twas the night before Christmas, when all through the forum
Not a person was posting; Not even a Goron.

The members were asleep or hung over in sin,
Hoping their jobs and schools wont call them in;
The GBA's and GC's were nestled all snug in their carts,
While visions of Dual Screens danced in their hearts;

Dark Jaguar in her 'kerchief, the blue one I hate,
And I had just sat down for a quiet masturbate
When out on the lawn there arose such a clatter,
I lost my erection, Shit, what's the matter!?

Away to the window I flew like a flash,
Tore open the shutters and put my nose to the glass.
Outside it was dark, I thought as I scratched my ass
When, what to my wondering eyes should I see,
But a jap Volkwagen and 8 tiny investors... who stopped to pee

With a little old driver, so lively and quick,
I knew in a moment it must be St. Nick.
He put on his coat and popped open his trunk
Then he yelled to me... he must be drunk

"Mario 64 with Dual Screens, multiplayer sans wires or strings
Metroid Echoes with a Wavebird or three
And a Final Fantasy 1 and 2 under the tree.
EAD and me, you see, we've been working hard this eve
To bring all the American boys and men
A reason to fall in love with Video games again"

I scratched my head and thought "holy krap!"
"It's Miyamoto, and he I think he's on crack!"
He threw hard candy and broke open my window
Then laughed and cackled like Max von Sydow!

He unsheathed a sword, grabed his penis and yelled "UHUAHA"
I wondered for a second if he celebrates Hanukkah
He dropped GC games, SP as well. A DS, with X/Y that looked real swell
And when he jumped back to his Volkswagen 'sleigh'
I thought "Just like Punisher!" (Not the one from Jonathan Hensleigh)

He put it in drive (smog poured out), honked his horn in the cloud
(As you can imagine, It played the Mario theme... really loud)
And as he drove off, throwing hard candy at children
I thought to myself this night's conclusion:

I hope you all got what you wanted, cuz I already recieved this;
A message board full of goofballs, introverts and weirdness
A family I love and I wife that 53X0RZ me senseless

And as I laid back down feeling horny and sleepy
(Thinking that Miyamoto's frikin creepy)

I thought good night forum members and friends --

MERRY CHRISTMAS TENDO CITY!!!!

And that was the end.


Post your loot here! Tell everybody what presents you got, ones you didn't, and who you're going to treat like shit for the next year till their next chance to suck up to you! It's Christmas, baby! WOOOOO!!!!!! SHIT THE BED!!!!!


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Nick Burns - 25th December 2004

Merry Christmas Lazy.

Keep up the good work.


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Darunia - 25th December 2004

Merry Chrismahannakwanzakah to you!

*Goron Bureau of Christmas Affairs releases declaration from Emperor Marcus Darunia XX: All national debts and wars are forgiven and made null and void. Until the next time one of you pisses me off.

Happy Chrismahannakwanzakah from the Goron Empire


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - EdenMaster - 25th December 2004

Well a happy non-denominational-politaclly-correct-late-December holiday to all of you, as well! Loot, you say? Well this years haul for me was:

MGS3: Snake Eater (yet to play it, but I imagine I'll probably be up all night with it)
A new cell phone
Seinfeld Seasons 1-3 DVD Sets
George Carlins book "When will Jesus Bring the Pork Chops?"
Some sweatshirts
Two T-shirts, one of Monty Python and the Holy Grail's Black Knight saying "It's only a flesh wound! Come back here and I'll bite your legs off!" and another with Homer Simpson saying "Everyone is stupid except me!"
And a pantload of batteries (I go through them quicker than Ryan goes through women)

And that's not even all yet. I still have to see my grandparents and my brother's family before my list is complete, however, I'm happy thus far.

:goron:


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - lazyfatbum - 25th December 2004

I got awesome clothes!!!!!

and I got a cool ring!!!!!!!!

I got an electric razor and it's cool!!!!!!!!

a new tooth brush!!!!!!! (family is giving me a hint I think)

I got a new Leatherman!!!!!!!!!!

I got a neat journal with an embossed wizard on it!!!!!!!!!!!

I got a cold!!!!!!!!!!!


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - EdenMaster - 25th December 2004

lazyfatbum Wrote:I got a cold!!!!!!!!!!!

Who gave you that? I'd return it if I were you.

Where is everybody?


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Geno - 25th December 2004

Things I got that I wanted:
Led Zeppelin: Remasters
Metallica: Ride the Lightning
Metallica: Master of Puppets
Pink Floyd: Animals
Pink Floyd: Dark Side of the Moon
Pink Floyd: Wish You Were Here
The First 100 Strong Bad Emails
Mario & Luigi: Superstar Saga
Kirby & the Amazing Mirror

Things I didn't ask for but got anyway and are still cool:
A new hairdryer (I needed one)
An automobile safety kit (I had just gotten a car a few months ago)
A wireless mouse and keyboard
South Park pajamas

Things I asked for but didn't get:
Final Fantasy Anthology
Final Fantasy Chronicles
Animaniacs: Wakko's Wish (you can still find the VHS on Amazon.com)

Overall, I'd say this was a great Christmas. Big improvement over last year, when I got only three things on my list. This year, there were only three things on my list that I didn't get.


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Weltall - 25th December 2004

I had no list this year. I got $160 cash and underwear.

And I had to work.

Merry Christmas, y'all.


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - lazyfatbum - 25th December 2004

Rtan, you're getting a paid off car for Christmas. Remember? :D

And what the holy krap, how does a guy get a hairdrier for christmas??

Wait till Minka posts what she got :D


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Laser Link - 25th December 2004

Hey everybody. Hope you all had a great Christmas. Rtan called me last night, so I had to return and say WAAAAASSSSSSUUUUUUUUP! Sorry for missing your call and not calling you back. And don't you be talking smack against my Chargers. :)

This has been a cool Christmas. It's been wierd cause this is the first itme in my life I haven't had at least 2 weeks off for Christmas. Now I get... 1 day! But it's still good. Last night my church had the first service in their new really cool building. It holds over 7500 people and was still way too packed out. And my aunt flew up from LA so that was cool. My family gave me some cool stuff too, such as some cd's (Blindside-About a Burning Fire, One 21- Grenade, TheDeal- Who's Pulling Your Strings, Project 86- SOngs To Burn Your Bridges By), some new clothes (jeans, OneTruth.com hat, snowboarding jacket, hoodie, and an Underoath shirt (Underoath is my new favorite band!)), LotR:Return of the King Special Platinum Extended Uber Alpha++ Edition, and some other cool things. It was a fun day relaxing and goofing off and screaming to music that is played to loud and making everybody else mad. :D

And the Raiders lost.
And the Pats will lose.
And the Chargers will win and get the 2nd seed and a bye.
Just like 10 years ago.

Miss you guys. Email me, if you so desire, at Luke AT Ashaman DOT Net


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - A Black Falcon - 25th December 2004

If you miss us then find some time and post here more, we need more regular members again. :)

As for me... I got three books (a science history book, a cartoon collection (Lily Wong), and a biography of Alexander the Great (saw the Oliver Stone movie during Thanksgiving break and I liked it, darnit, no matter what the reviews say)), the extended editions of LOTR: TTT and RoTK, and $50. I'll get a bit more in a few days when our relatives come. :)


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - lazyfatbum - 26th December 2004

LL! Yes post more! Merry Christmas! and screw football!

I dunno what happened to the board... first some guy gets a hairdrier for Christmas and now ABF likes Alexander. I feel homo. How can any human being "like" Alexander? That's like saying I "like" having my ball sac ripped open with a wine bottle opener while french kissing Richard Simmons. I can see how cats would enjoy Alexander, lots of color and movement, good stuff if you're a cat... sure. But come on... Braveheart meets Natural Born Killers with a hearty helping of homosexuality? The movie was made by 6th graders! GAY 6th graders!


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - A Black Falcon - 26th December 2004

I'm not sure why it's so disliked... perhaps it's because people don't have attention spans anymore in this country, or because the movie makes a lot more sense if you have a decent knowledge of the history already (it does not pander to the lowest common denominator like most films do and I appreciate that)... I never thought it would do well in American and it didn't, but I bet it does better elsewhere. It's not perfect (for one thing I would have liked to see Greek-Persian battles before the big one... even one... I know, you can only fit so much in a three hour movie of a person's life, but it'd still have been nice), but I came away definitely statisfied that it was good.

Troy did well at the box office and much better in public opinion because, unlike Alexander, it is a Hollywood movie made for American audiences. I didn't like that movie much at all. Alexander is far, far better than that stupid movie...


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Geno - 26th December 2004

Ryan Wrote:I had no list this year. I got $160 cash and underwear.

And I had to work.

Merry Christmas, y'all.

I would've volunteered to work for Christmas since we opened all our presents on Christmas Eve and there were several benefits being offered to the people who worked on Christmas... but, there were about three or four shifts open to people in my position, and they were already taken when I found out about this. So... no free ham, no time and a half pay, just an entire day off to relax and enjoy my presents. Guess I was a winner either way.


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Darunia - 26th December 2004

Darunia a reçu les suivants:

-Futurama seasons III & IV (I now have all 4)
-Mark Twain compilation
-Airplane II dvd (I already have Airplane I)
-Russian dictionary
-Two shirts
-Happy Gilmore/Billy Madison set
-$170


But Santa didn't get me what I really wanted for Christmas--the heart of one very special gal.

*Issue ultimatum to Santa; render unto me that which I desire or suffer thine own consequences*


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - EdenMaster - 26th December 2004

Darunia Wrote:But Santa didn't get me what I really wanted for Christmas--the heart of one very special gal.

Ah, you have to wait until February for that. Cupid's arrows are a rare commodity, and cannot be forged by mere elves. Wait until Valentines Day, that's your chance!

Laser Lin Wrote:(Underoath is my new favorite band!)


What? No Relient K? You must not be the true Laser Link! You must prove to me that you are the real deal by posting regularly again :D! Trust must be earned! Start now!

Geno Wrote:A new hairdryer (I needed one)


I thought you were male Dunno But you got some good music and a great games (you will love Superstar Saga, hilarious game) so I suppose your...other gift is forgiven. For now.

Ryan Wrote:I got $160 cash and underwear.


Well what is that cash going to become in the following weeks?


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Great Rumbler - 26th December 2004

Quote:Pink Floyd: Animals
Pink Floyd: Dark Side of the Moon
Pink Floyd: Wish You Were Here

Truly a worthy Christmas gift.

Here's my haul:

-RahXephon volumes 6,7
-Trigun volumes 3,5,8
-From Beijing With Love [Stephen Chow!]
-Arrested Development Season 1 [Now, shut up, OB1!!]
-Burnout 3 [freaking awesome]
-Pikmin 2
-Harvest Moon: A Wonderful Life
-La Pucelle Tacicts
-Metal Gear Solid 3
-A foosball table
-2001: A Space Odyssey [The book]
-And an assortment of various teeth-rotting candies

Basically, I got just about everything on my list.


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - EdenMaster - 26th December 2004

Great Rumbler Wrote:-Arrested Development Season 1 [Now, shut up, OB1!!]

:far-out:


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Weltall - 26th December 2004

EdenMaster Wrote:Well what is that cash going to become in the following weeks?

You know.


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - OB1 - 26th December 2004

Quote:-Arrested Development Season 1 [Now, shut up, OB1!!]

IT'S ABOUT DAMN TIME!

Now watch it and prepare to laugh your ass off.


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - OB1 - 26th December 2004

Quote:-Burnout 3 [freaking awesome]

I know, it's also got the coolest damn racing tracks ever created, including some jaw-dropping HK recreations.


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - buckey_lasek - 26th December 2004

didn't really get too much but i got christmas off this year and got to spend christmas with some of my friends.


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - EdenMaster - 26th December 2004

Ryan Wrote:You know.

Ah yes. Indeed.


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Undertow - 26th December 2004

Mario Kart double dash
Prince of Persia 2
256mb mp3 player
Shaun of the Dead (dvd)
Star Wars Trilogy (dvd)
Dark Tower VII
$20 waldenbooks gift card
clothing


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Great Rumbler - 26th December 2004

Quote:Now watch it and prepare to laugh your ass off.

I've watched the first 6 episodes so far and you're right, it is a hilarious show. It's got great stuff like Buster's long string of bleeped-out expletives, "Steve-O!", David Cross, The stair car, the banana stand, and George Sr.'s inexplicable desire to play softball in prison. Awesome and hilarious stuff.

Quote:I know, it's also got the coolest damn racing tracks ever created, including some jaw-dropping HK recreations.

And the insanely fun Road Rage mode. Easily my favorite part of a very awesome game.


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Geno - 26th December 2004

EdenMaster Wrote:I thought you were male Dunno But you got some good music and a great games (you will love Superstar Saga, hilarious game) so I suppose your...other gift is forgiven. For now.

What, I have to be female to dry my hair when I get out of the shower? Though sometimes, I don't dry it and just comb it over. I always put gel in it to keep it down anyway.

And yes, Superstar Saga is indeed hilarious.


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - lazyfatbum - 26th December 2004

Hey Geno, Vidal Sasoon called, they said you're damn gay.

Hi Buckey, I have no idea who you are but your text looks like a woman posted it so now I have to blow air quickly in to your anus. Some call it a femalloon or Woboon but I actually prefer to think of it as a kind of serving platter, eg: sushi or firmly pressed chopped hams for cracker spread from your anus (a dispenser). But you get the idea atleast.

Oh, and when i'm done blowing air up your butt, try to hold it in for as long as possible. Some women said they got euphoric effects! while others said they got a small curd cottage cheese infection. But hey, that's why men invented monistat right? if we infect'em, we clean'em! That's the motto in my book.

My book also has an entire section on things that can fit in to the man-rod's wee wee hole. Dont be so quick to try paper clips when there's plenty of coffee stirers around, that's all i'm sayin.

So, yeah.

*quickly blows air in to buckey_lasik's anus*


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Great Rumbler - 26th December 2004

Quote:What, I have to be female to dry my hair when I get out of the shower

Most guys just use a towel. That's what they're for!


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Geno - 26th December 2004

I use a towel to dry my hair too... nobody ever told me that hairdryers are feminine, my parents just raised me that way... or my mom... I don't know. I hung out with my sister a lot as a child. Whateva.

But as for the suggestion that I'm gay... did I mention I what a sick perv I am? I like boobies. I stare at pictures of Tifa for hours wishing that she was real. Then I realize that there are picturs of real women who are just as hot that I can look at. But whatever the case, I don't really care if I have one or two feminine traits amongst my many masculine characteristics, I'm content enough with my sexuality. Now that I've broken up with my girlfriend, though, I'm rather lonely... ah well, not like I was gonna marry her anyway.

As for the rest of the things lazyfatbum said... I don't even know what the hell he's talking about most of the time in his posts, so... yeah. I'm going to leave that alone. In closing...



...and I'm not.


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Great Rumbler - 26th December 2004

Eric Estrada is the biznotch....and I don't even know what that means.

Quote:But as for the suggestion that I'm gay... did I mention I what a sick perv I am? I like boobies. I stare at pictures of Tifa for hours wishing that she was real. Then I realize that there are picturs of real women who are just as hot that I can look at. But whatever the case, I don't really care if I have one or two feminine traits amongst my many masculine characteristics, I'm content enough with my sexuality.

:clap:


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Darunia - 26th December 2004

Awe jeeze, Undertow only JUST got Double Dash--think of all the great races he's missed out on!! Best multiplayer game since the days of the N64, that.


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Laser Link - 26th December 2004

Relient K's new cd, Mmhmm, is also really good. But it has a lot more of a pop/rock feel with piano and stuff. It's not really my thing as much, and Underoath is so original to me. Sort of a punk/core with just enough screaming to make it fun. I really love their new cd.

See, I have my list of all time favs (like dc Talk, Newsboys, Audio A, Relient K, FIF) that I love and always will love, even if I don't listen to all that much anymore. And then there are the new bands and new styles I am really enjoying now because they are different. Like Underoath, Dogwood, One 21, The Deal, Blindside, etc.

ABF, I appreciate that you guys still want me around. It's tough now, because I've got so much other stuff going on. Working full time, and I was working a lot of overtime till the contract ran out of money and they cut us all off. Plus I'm doing an internship thing called <a href="http://www.thefurnace.net">the Furnace</a> and that is another 20 hours a week. And I'm really trying to spend more time with God, praying and reading my Bible and stuff like that. It's so cool because the more I do it the more I want to, but other things get pushed out of the way. I've had more time the past couple weeks since the Furnace is on break and I've been playing some World of Warcraft trying to catch up to my friends who are 10 levels ahead of me. I'll try to get around here more often, but I can't promise much. Sorry.

You guys should check out the Furnace website. They have some cool videos of different events we did the last semester. You'll get to see us doing all kinds of crazy stuff and getting into tons of trouble. :D


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - lazyfatbum - 27th December 2004

Okay, reading the bible is NOT fun. Some dude flies in to a golden disk that's piloted by naked women and then a chick randomly turns to salt, some old guy tries to kill his son but kills a farm animal instead, and that somehow teaches him a valuable lesson and then a guy who runs around telling everyone in a small town that they're wrong about everything and then destroyes his government (completely pissing everyone off) and is killed by a much larger and more powerful government who kills him with a torturing device called a crusifix that we all celebrate and wear around our necks... hello!? You dont see anyone wearing little gold electric chairs, do you?

And then the multi-headed dragons with multiple horns who rise from the boiling oceans that eat naked people who are covered in wine and gold for some reason then the sun turns red and everybody dies because we either dont do the right things enough or we do the bad things too much and just to make it interesting, what's considered good and bad changes every 100 years or so so that when we read of good people who lived 400 years ago they sound like devil worshipers and bad people end up sounding like someone we would give a medal! To top it all off we're told that everything that exists took a week to make, so it's not like it's special or anything. Give God another week and he'll make the whole universe again just as good as the last one. Well, good... yeah. Considering that he had to murder and pillage entire cities at once just to prove his point and then ultimately destroy everything he created because we didn't read the fine print on the cosmic contract. I mean COME ON! How on Earth is that fun to read??

And then if it wasn't bad enough, sometime around the creation of Christianity we're told that sex is bad. WHAT THE KRAP??? EVERY SINGLE LIVING THING ON THE PLANET HAS TO DO IT OR ELSE THEY DIE OUT AND ANY ANIMAL THAT HAS THE MENTAL CAPACITY TO THINK BEYOND MERE SURVIVAL INSTINCTS HAS SEX AS A FORM OF SHOWING AFFECTION JUST LIKE WHEN YOUR CAT RUBS IT'S FACE ALL OVER YOUR LEGS, AND THAT'S ALL CONSIDERED BAD!??! NOW MY CAT IS GOING TO HELL FOR SHOWING PHYSICAL AFFECTION!??! THE FUCK THE HELL THE SHIT! I AM THROWING MY BULLSHIT FLAG SO HARD RIGHT NOW! AND GUESS WHAT?!?! GOD SAYS SEX IS HORRIBLE AND BAD BUT THEN SAYS IF YOU'RE GAY IT'S "REALLY BAD"! WTF, I HATE GAYS BECAUSE THEY FUCKING ACT GAY BUT I COULD GIVE A SHIT HOW THEY FUCK! I MEAN EVEN ANTS FUCK! EVERYBODY FUCKS EXCEPT FROGS AND MOST FISH AND THERE'S NOT A FUCKING THING WRONG WITH FUCKING DAMMIT!!!!!!!

The bible... is not fun to read.

Huckelberry Finn, now THAT is fun to read.


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Dark Jaguar - 27th December 2004

Just one point lazy.

Not EVERY creature needs to have sex. they just need to reproduce.

Asexual division, it's reproduction only rather than any sort of intimacy it has all the fun of any other regulated bodily function, the reproductional equivilent of taking a dump. Or, it's like giving birth without ANYTHING else, you know, like the virgin Mary, how was that a good deal for her anyway?

Come to think of it, reproduction is really only needed due to a need to survive as long as possible. Just get some of that eternal life stuff and reproduction no longer has a purpose. Hmm, maybe that's why people actually would forgo sex in favor of seeking a potion of eternal life, or you know, obstain for the sake of their faith which promises that very thing.


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Geno - 27th December 2004

I don't think anybody's Lord and Savior was killed in an electric chair.


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Great Rumbler - 27th December 2004

I always wanted a clone...but then I remember that cloning doesn't really work that well, so instead I ate a sandwich and played some Harvest Moon.


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Geno - 27th December 2004

Everyone thinks they would get along well with a clone of themself, but then they learn that the clone has all the same desires as the original and will fight with the original to achieve these desires. Plus, neither one is going to want to tack a number 2 at the end of their name.


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - lazyfatbum - 27th December 2004

Geno Wrote:I don't think anybody's Lord and Savior was killed in an electric chair.

The United States Government said that last year there were over 1 million legitimate temples and organizations devouted to Satan. In these temples and organizations they worship murders, rapists, sexual offenders and other criminals as their saviors, lords and deciples.

1 million people, Geno. In some parts of the world, that's a country.

But regardless, as far as stories go, wearing a device of torture to celebrate someone you respect is idiotic. hundreds of thousands of people died on a crusifix at the hands of Rome. Some were innocent, some were murderers, rapists, sexual offenders and other criminals. The very idea that I am supposed to celebrate this device in the story makes no sense to me. To see a man that I respect and love dead on a device of torture covered in his blood does nothing more than make me hate ancient Rome and the high priests.

DJ/ I totally agree with you. The entire displacement of human societal awareness has perversed itself in to extremes. However, not at any time should physical affection to a loved one be considered a bad deed. In fact the level of which we can produce this physical and emotional affection is what seperates us from every other animal on Earth and it should be celebrated.

People who obstain from sexual contact in the hopes of getting a reward is a rediculous notion. Waiting to have your first sexual experience until you find a person you love is commendable and shows respect for yourself and for your future love. But to wipe it out completely will only drive you insane as the human brain (4th and 5th) mammalia) needs some kind of physical plus mental release of affection, be it hugging, embracing, kissing, masturbating, 'sex-play' and/or intercorse. Even Nuns and priests are encouraged to masturbate because the church's and temples know that totally destroying all sexual release in a person's life will drive them litteraly to the edges of reason. Which is exactly what is happening in Catholosism.

Now stop replying, i'm trying to piss off LL so he posts more!


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - OB1 - 27th December 2004

Quote:I've watched the first 6 episodes so far and you're right, it is a hilarious show. It's got great stuff like Buster's long string of bleeped-out expletives, "Steve-O!", David Cross, The stair car, the banana stand, and George Sr.'s inexplicable desire to play softball in prison. Awesome and hilarious stuff.

Wait until you see the next discs. Man, the show just gets funnier and funnier with each new episode, and since there are so many long-running jokes when you re-watch them you'll laugh even harder than the first time. I've seen each episode 3-4 times already. :D

Oh and he's saying "STEVE HOLT!", not "Steve-O!". :D His name is Steve Holt.

Quote:And the insanely fun Road Rage mode. Easily my favorite part of a very awesome game.

Indeed.


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Dark Jaguar - 27th December 2004

Ya know, once I actually heard the exact thing you said about wearing an electric chair instead of a cross, only it was a priest trying to prove a point at a sermon, with a much sunnier attitude :D. The basic thing was to remind us that the only thing that symbol really represents is what Christ was willing to go through. Then of course you can wax philosophic about how that makes the symbol represent more than the sum of it's part and about how it represents love, or at least the part of love where you are willing to sacrifice stuff...


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - lazyfatbum - 27th December 2004

Right. So Suzy's kitten was drown by some teenagers and she wants to tell people how much she loved her cat by showing a reinactment of how a t-shirt was used to drown kittens to show how horrible it is and to keep it from happening again. Makes sense.

And then, to further prove her point that her cat is loved and missed, everyone can get "This t-shirt was used to drown kittens" t-shirts!

That'll spread the love! huzzah!


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Dark Jaguar - 27th December 2004

:D

I wonder, ya think at some point some marketting evil genius will try selling ACTUAL crosses people can strap to their own backs?

Wait a sec, church decorations.... huh... Well it's not like they are actually being used for that very thing... right?

*looks at that more unorthodox church over thAr* ......hhhuh... That's.... that's not exactly what Christ was going for...


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - lazyfatbum - 27th December 2004

lmao I sure as hell hope not.

I remember when Passion of the Christ came out and there were Passion of the Christ ™ nails. They're reproductions of the kind of nails used to hang Jesus from the cross. And people were buying them like mad. Nails... with the words (in the font used for the film) "The Passion of the Christ" written down the side. I was so disgusted I was beside myself. What are you supposed to do with something like that? Reinact the passion at home? Hey mom! hey dad! let's play that game where we pretend to act out humanities greatest fuck up! "Oops, we killed our savior"!

But then I saw Passion of the Christ 'Crusipens' and I had heard that a breakfast cereal was also planned then I knew for a fact that I had already died and I was living in hell.

You've colored HIS eggs!

You've decorated HIS tree!

Now eat HIS body and drink HIS blood every morning!

'The Passion of the Christ Cereal'! - "Jesus, that's good!"
Do onto others as you would do onto your breakfast cereal! Just add whole-ly milk and watch as the frosted Roman flakes attack the blueberry marshmallow Jews and create Christian Milk!

*kids watch in awe as the milk turns red*

Kid #1: WOW it changed color!

Kid #2: It looks like blood!

Kid #3: Jesus died for our breakfast!

Free 'Passion Mask' INSIDE! Says 3 different phrases!

"I'm still Jewish!"

"Ever hear the one about the Catholic and the swollen asshole?"

"Oy!"

LOOK IN THE BREAKFAST AISLE!!!!!!


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Great Rumbler - 27th December 2004

Quote:People who obstain from sexual contact in the hopes of getting a reward is a rediculous notion.

Nothing like that it taught at the church that I attend [Church of Christ, btw], maybe the Catholics say something like that though. Of course abstinence until marriage is taught, but that's a bit different.


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Geno - 27th December 2004

Passion of the Christ cereal... that's genius!


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Dark Jaguar - 27th December 2004

Kids: I'd like to learn about the Bible and stuff, but Sunday School is just soooo boring!

Announcer: Hey kids! It's me, GOD! And with these new Bible action figures and playsets, you'll be learning all about the meanings of stuff!

Help Jesus carry his own cross with new Kung-fu action grip!

There may not be any room at the inn, but there's PLENTY of room in Malibu Mary's split level beach house!

*Jesus shows up, and He is frickin' PO'd*

Um... *99999 damage LITERALLY appears on the screen, which is a new law of reality that scientists have to figure out*


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Laser Link - 28th December 2004

Hahaha, lazy, you know you aren't going to piss me off like that.

The cross is a reminder of what Jesus went through to save us and how he beat death and made a way for us to live the best life possible. Yeah, it is a bit morbid in the one sense, and I don't know when it became a "good symbol" to Christians instead of a bad. It wasn't a good thing in the early days- instead they used a fish sign to identify themselves to other believers.


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Geno - 28th December 2004

A lot of people still use the fish sign to this day.


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - lazyfatbum - 28th December 2004

He posted!

Okay, now you know that team you like? Aren't they called the "SUCKING SUCKSTERS"?? You know why...? Because they suck! They suck so hard!!!! oh MAN, it's like sucking on top of sucking!!!! Inverse sucking!!!! and they NEVER win! because they suck at winning! All they do is lose! AND THEY SUCK AT LOSING TOO! MY PUBIC HAIRS ARE BETTER AT FOOTBALL/BASEBALL/WHATEVER IT IS THAT TEAM IS IN TO THAN THEY'LL EVER HOPE TO BECOME!!!!!

btw the fish-thing was actually created by the egyptians to mark Jews and other slaves. Years later, Christians adopted the symbol to show that they are 'true Jews' who follow the king of the Jews. So that fish symbol is a sign of slavery. True story. You big slavery worshiper! only a SLAVE WORSHIPER would like the SUCKING SUCKSTERS!

*waits*


MERRY CHRISMUNAKKAH!!!!!!!!!!!!! - Great Rumbler - 28th December 2004

*also waits*