Tendo City

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Wow...

He really likes to beat people up.

He likes to clone himself, dress up as Santa and terrorize children at Christmas, and Sephiroth himself out of flames.

Don't you remember? Cool guys don't look at explosions.

Ever wonder why the Saturn did so much better in Japan?

... Well, anyone want to deny that it was because of Segata there? :D

Well I'd buy the CD-i if he threatened me to.

Segata Sanshiro was Sega's Saturn mascot character though, why would he be selling CD-is?

No I'm saying that if HE was demanding it, I'd buy even a crappy system, so of course he'd be able to sell Saturns. You have to BE there with me for these jokes to work!

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Did... did he just make soccer look awesome?

Gamara won't save children from SEGATA!

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He'll mess you up without provocation.

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He didn't just copy Bomberman's powers, he improved it! He's frickin' Amazo from the Justice League cartoon.

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But he does have a romantic side, capable of wooing all females in a 30 kilometer radius at all times.

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Man or woman, he'll mess up your junk if you dance to terrible music.

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He's apparently training not to RIDE a dragon but to BE a dragon.

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"Wow I didn't know you knew CPR!"

"What the hell is CPR?"

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Things are looking bad near the end, but he just doesn't like the taste of zombies. If he bit them they'd turn into Segatas.

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Told you so.

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He saved Sega corporation with his life, or did he survive? Well we can hear him shouting in space but not a nuclear explosion.

Meanwhile Sega's American commercials had frightening disembodied heads just trying to sound "extreme" at you. Yeah...