LMAO i'm glad I use them
However God said that we need to stop using them before my wife turns 35. I dunno what he meant by that.
God, or somebody talking to me in my head, also told me I need to go on at least one homicidal rampage before I turn 35, but I pretty sure I understand what he meant by that.
The Voices told me to get a job, I don't know what that's all about.
...
No, YOU get a job!!
Somebody told me that having sex with a condom is a lot like eating candy with the wrapper still on it.
Somebody told me to hit myself...I didn't though.
...I'll do it.
Sex with a condom is fine, there's virtually no downside. the only thing I hate is sometimes you'll be able to lower the shields of your wife and start "mackin" (hip lingo for you youngsters) and then realize you're out of condoms... there is no other way to describe it other than true and absolute pain after hearing those famous words from your wife: "Hey asshole, if you dont wrap it you gotta whack it, pishaw."